As a child, your parents did you wrong. 3 practical ways to reparent yourself and take your power back.

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Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Madison’s reflection —

“My parents made my life miserable. I was abused by my mother and my father left when I was 11. I worked my butt off. I have a successful career, yet holding onto my childhood’s baggage. I’m struggling in my marriage and my childhood experience is a shadow tagging me around, (sic).”

Parents, in most cases, use what they have to parent themselves and their children.

“Our parents are human.” — Dr. Nicole LePera

What causes child abuse? Some parents were abused as children, lived in extreme poverty, experienced domestic violence, or had an untreated mental illness.


Educate yourself by interviewing your parents, relatives, historians, and visit a local or nearby University library for materials.

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Photo by Elijah Hail on Unsplash

“The more you know of your history, the more liberated you are.” — -Maya Angelou.

My Sociology 101 class taught me the importance of a well-researched history; also, how ignorance can be expensive.

In my freshwoman class, a Scripture Union classmate was loud, and she disapproved of my choice of clothing — jeans trousers.

The professor walked in, listened to her stupid argument — her Bible and her Pastors were against women wearing pants. The professor laughed and assigned the class a research project — the history of fashion in Nigeria. …


Ways to spot bad salespeople and stay away from them.

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Photo by LinkedIn Sales Navigator on Unsplash

“When a salesperson cares about you, trust forms, and you are more likely to buy, come back for repeat business, and refer new customers.” Adam Grant

Last month, I received a daily email from a writer, and I was confused. I unsubscribed the writer, but continue to read “her/his” work.

Salesperson: Sending your readers daily email without their permission is a waste of your time. Your followers know where to find your work without you stalking them with non-stop email and self-promotion.

Sure, you need to sell your articles and yourself, but there is a better way to do it. …


She is comfortable with her own skin, ready to share her story, and do the work.

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https://www.harris.senate.gov/about

“Don’t just sit around and complain about things. Do something.” — Shyamala Gopalan

Kamala Harris is ready to share her story and work for you. She is fearless and well-prepared to prosecute anyone who breaks the law. She is a proud African-American and Indian-American woman who lives life and does the work.

Kamala’s mother, Dr. Shyamala Gopalan, was a breast cancer researcher and a civil rights activist who drilled in her and her sister to stop complaining about a problem but focus on finding the solution. Dr. …


As a human being, be proud and value your self-interest.

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Photo by Larry Crayton on Unsplash

You have the right to value yourself and your vote.

What can you do moving forward? Hold politicians accountable for their actions while they are in office. If a politician can’t deliver on her or his promises, vote her or him out after two or four years. Or recall a do-nothing politician as Californians did with their former Governor, Mr. Davis.

I think voters can learn to make politics like a business — no sentiment or excuses not to evaluate a politician. Think of your own job’s annual evaluation or, as a student, your final examination.

“They only come to our community when they need our vote.” …


First, find true love in you and then in “not my type of people.”

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Photo by Susan Kirsch on Unsplash

What is true love?

True love never ends. True love is not hurtful, hateful, or mean.

Love has many dimensions and complicated. What seems like true love today maybe something else tomorrow. Have you ever seen a relationship where everyone believes two people were a match made in heaven, but after a few years, a nasty divorce ruined everything? Yes, I have seen many lovely couples who had a nasty divorce after a few months to forty years of marriage. Some fought a Civil War, and a divorce attorney smiled and deposited a fat check into his/her bank account.

One Almighty Question:

Is love blind? Is your love blind? …


No judgment: drop guilt, doubt, and anger.

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Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash

“If you judge people , you have no time to love them.” Mother Teresa

I choose not to host Thanksgiving, but I do host Christmas.

For many years, I worked as a hotline crisis counselor on Thanksgiving day from 7 am-noon. Most of the callers feared the Thanksgiving family dinner for various reasons. Some of the callers described their emotions as feeling guilty for not living up to their parent’s expectations, anxious sharing the same room with their family members, and angry with themselves and their family members. …


It’s a path to self-affirming and wisdom.

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Photo by Persnickety Prints on Unsplash

Self-acceptance is freedom.

It comes with experience.
Self-acceptance is ongoing:
Accept things you cannot change.
Accept the length of your fingers.
Accept the size of your ears.
Accept and deal with your emotions.

Self-acceptance is freedom

It comes with experience.
Self-acceptance is ongoing:
Accept the aging process.
I celebrate my strengths.
Work on my weaknesses
Focus on learning

Self-acceptance is wisdom.

Help yourself grow.


She is a woman and a mother. Please choose not to blame her for getting the job. A woman and a mother saved the seat for her. Call Amy and tell her your personal stories. Use your power and help her see herself in you.

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Photo by Tingey Injury Law Firm on Unsplash

Women, when you have power, use it front and center.

I am an activist. My grandmother, Adiaha Orok, was a political activist. My mother and my daughter are too.

As an activist, I have to confess that I see things as black and white, but I work hard to see all colors as a woman. For me, I am at peace and free when I see many colors and listen to offer sincere empathy. Is it easy for me, “No”? As always, you have the right to hold onto your personal view and use your power for the common good.

Amy’s record shows she is a black and white individual like many of us. We can be honest just for today. However, she is a US Supreme Justice for everyone. …


3 ways never to give up on your true dream.

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Photo by Iqx Azmi on Unsplash

Dream. You’re the dreamer and you know her or him.

The 2020 US presidential election has come and gone.

Some people are excited, and others are mourning, but we all can learn a life-lesson — never to give up on your true dream.

It doesn’t matter who you voted for, but Joe has taught many of us never to give up on our true dream.

Today, Mr. Joe Biden is the US President-elect after 42 years of dreaming of becoming the United States President. Your true dream can come true if you choose not to give up.

3 ways never to give up on your true dream:

Check your inflated ego:

Our ego influences how well we work in our dreams, but, also, it can ruin our dream and life. …

About

Bassey Elimian

LMSW🧠Social Worker* Lifestyle Consultant* Health/Recovery Coach* I enjoy putting things together• I write stories that help you grow @bybassey. Kulifestyle.com

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