What Are You Sorry For?

Say “sorry” if it’s genuine. And like anything else, don’t make your “sorry” a common commodity for everyone and everything.

ometimes, a fake “sorry” is stupid.

Saying sorry is OK if it’s genuine, and like anything else, don’t make your “sorry” a common commodity for every Harry and Helen.

Saying sorry often can do more harm than good. Studies suggest you look cheap when you fake sorry. Is saying sorry a habit for you?

Saying “I’m Sorry” is a habit. I chose not to believe this until I observed a bright young woman, Marka, a few days ago. She has one adult child and two teenagers.

I worked with Marka for 10 hours last Monday. She used these expressions, “I’m sorry and Okay,” a few hundred times throughout the day. She used them every time she wanted to do something or interact with others. It amazed me because she knew what she was doing or talking about, but she kept running around to ask others for confirmation.

I bit my tongue several times, and I thought, “ she is so perfect.” Marka mastered perfection skills, and she displaced them for everyone to notice. Sure, I admired her as a human being, and I found it difficult to point to her positive strengths. I did it anyway.

Gender or culture influences how we use the word, sorry. From my experience, women are likely to say sorry more than men in the US, and Nigerian men and women rarely say sorry if they don’t mean it.

Sometimes, I say “sorry” without thinking about it. And I’ve worked hard to be conscious of the words sorry and OK. Now, I replaced sorry with thank you and OK with silence.

Saying sorry often can do more harm than good. Studies suggest you look cheap when you fake sorry. Is saying sorry a habit for you?

How to decrease saying “sorry”:

  • Listen more than talking.
  • Say sorry if you mean it.
  • Replace a fake sorry or OK with silence.
  • Perfection is a myth; no one is perfect. Be yourself.
  • Replace saying sorry with — thank you for understanding, or thanks for your patience.
  • Reflect on your interaction with people and things and make a change if you need to.
  • Practice not saying a fake sorry with your family and friends.
  • Add what works for you before!

Saying sorry is OK if it’s genuine and, like anything else, don’t make your “sorry” a common commodity for every Harry and Helen.

Help yourself grow.

©BY

Bassey is a lifestyle consultant and a health/recovery coach. She has two decades of mental health and addiction recovery experience, holds NYS social work license, and is currently in private practice. She enjoys organizing and writing.

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LMSW🧠Social Worker* Lifestyle Consultant* Health/Recovery Coach* I enjoy putting things together• I write stories that help you grow @bybassey. Kulifestyle.com

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