In 2021, mental illness is still a stigma in all families and cultures. Do we tell people about our loved ones who live with mental illness as we do if they had cancer?
The Interview — Meghan wore a flowing casual navy blue grown with her hair pulled back. Harry appeared in a gray suit. They both welcomed the fans to see them as themselves.
Many couples and families saw themselves in MeghanHarry and the royal family.
Have an open-mind. MeghanHarry's interview speaks to many of us and our families. All families including Royal family are raw and need a lot of cooking.
I don’t usually follow the royal family because of Charles, Diana, Diana’s sister, and Camilia’s drama — it’s lovely history.
However, my daughter called and asked me to watch MeghanHarry’s interview. She explained that it would be a fun topic for our weekly conversation.
Reluctantly, I viewed the interview, and I am glad I did; and afterward, we focused our discussion on mental illness, cult, and traditional and modern marriage.
Mental illness in marriage:
WHO assesses 450 million people live with a mental disorder worldwide.
Mental illness in marriage can be a curse or a blessing.
MI is prevalent and still a sigma in most cultures worldwide. But we can speak up for MI as we all speak up for cancer. Speaking up is not only for us but for many people who are suffering in silence. For me, MI was the highlight of the interview.
Mental illness is a treatable disease, and many people living with it can live a productive life. Sometimes, people with MI are the shakers and movers of industries — the creators and the inventors of things we can’t live without. Let us fight mental illness as we fight cancer.
My professional experience shows people living with mental health issues tend to attract the same kind of people in any relationship. Why? Often, they understand and accept each other mental health struggles.
Pay attention to MI signs in your relationship. Often, MI is not obvious until a major event happens, such as a wedding, childbirth, or relocation.
Harry’s mother died when he was twelve years old, and Meghan suffers from family disorganization. Their childhood traumas make their experience worth listening to.
As individuals, we have different life experiences, and most importantly, we need to find effective ways to handle our issues.
Some people with MI are bold enough to seek treatment and live a productive life. Others choose to live in denial with the rewards of multiple nasty divorces and hopelessness.
Oops, our denial to shame others with MI; sometimes, this person is projecting.
Take the health history of your parents and see if they have MI. Work from there and seek a professional evaluation before any major event in your life.
Attend to your mental hygiene as you would a weekly manicure or a haircut.
Seek treatment for your MI on or before marriage or children. Make an appointment to meet with a counselor or psychotherapist today.
Are you joining a cult or a modern marriage partnership?
Cult and unhappiness in marriage:
MeghanHarry's public announcement is a lesson for young people and many marriages. Being in a cult is never a happy marriage or rarely helps us solve a generational problem.
Many traditional families are cult, and they thrive on unhappiness and worshiping of humans beings and things. In a cult marriage, reputation trumps character, human lives, health, and children's welfare.
Before joining a person in a marriage, first, visit her/his family and pay attention to what members do—things to look for in the cult family.
- Problems are swept under the rug.
- Rarely members question the head of the household — a man or a woman.
- Mind-controlling and brainwashing.
- Adults’ children often have no opinion or limited earning power.
- Codependency, untreated mental illness, or learning disability.
- Never-ending domestic violence and child abuse.
Be honest with yourself before saying yes to a cult or a traditional marriage where marriage is crowded with every Dick, Tom, and Helen.
The traditional marriage institution:
The traditional marriage institution is like a royal or religious institution. It thrives on secrecy, reputation, and luxury. This kind of marriage dwells with the pattern of cover-up and pattern of lies.
Traditional marriage is tough, especially if you are married into a different class — for example, Meghan. And as always, the elephant in the room is always an outsider who comes to steal the money others have work for, or you are coming to expose family’s secret or change outdated tradition.
So true, we used to have a low divorce rate because of traditional marriage. Why? Marriage used to be an add-on to social standing in society, promoting classism, sexism, colorism, and racism.
Today, in modern marriage, things are changing for the better. It is common to find couples with different backgrounds being happily married. Why? Couples want the freedom to be themselves. We want to be happy in our marriage, not live in a dictatorship.
Ask yourself this question; do you want a loving family, live peacefully, happily, and most importantly, healthy in your marriage?
Here are tips for you to deal with mental illness in a relationship and navigate a marriage institution.
- Get an MI evaluation before you get marry or have children.
- Be honest with yourself before you say yes to a cult marriage, where every Dick, Tom, and Helen is interfering.
- Ask yourself this question; do you want a loving family, live peacefully, happily, and most importantly, healthy in your marriage?
Help yourself grow.